Born to Burn.

I hold it all together.
Then it falls apart. Again, again and once again – the pieces of my heart and soul, lay on the well worn path.

The path my life has wandered on – as up and down I trace – to find each place to tear me up so I can re-arrange.

Me. How I am to be.

Each heartbreak stronger so I feel – more, each time, of all that’s real.

In love, in sadness, joy and grief, in life and so in death.

I cannot see too clearly now. My heart a mangled mess.
This time was surely once to come but now I must confess:

I thought I knew a little more – a little more than I did before…
And though I know, I know still nought, I had hoped I’d overcome –

Mortality that blindly sees itself, flung about the stars. Still in our constellation when –  one star slowly dies –
The loss we feel shall be revealed when we see it fall through skies.

Lighting up the sky, its life a gleaming trace, of all it has revealed to us in its death embrace.

I cannot see so clearly now! I ache within and out –  but, through the atmosphere I’ll burn, too follow natures pace.

We close our eyes to all that dies, we close our eyes to beauty. Let it be, please, not in vain we strain, and burn, against the course of time.

Look to the sky and see the glow of those we hope to hold, and know for all eternity who open up our eyes to see, where our broken pieces be – Where we watch on as they burn.

Where we shine and shine amongst the galaxies across our sky,

In life and death though just the self – our ego drifts on high.

Rearranged, re-exchanged,  reshaped, and re-affirmed –

Our hearts, our minds, our souls, entwined as star-dust glowing bright.
Each piece that breaks and falls through air, seen as it lights the sky – not hidden in the hands of time that shroud our fear-filled eyes.

Our fallen pieces burning up, may we too, watch as others burn for us –

Then a symphony of light we will see,

As new stars, will still be born to be,

As stars were born to burn.

Live on, light the darkness of time.

For this is our reason and rhyme.


Death Came Knocking

‘If we were having coffee’, is a thing on WordPress where folks talk about their week.

I seldom write about my week as such, as this is not a diary.

If I did do such a post weekly it would most certainly be called:

If  We Were Having Wine!’

So I had this week that was a week of all weeks…

It was filled with death. In that death there was life.

Life remembered.

My husbands uncle (who was more a father to him) was critically ill with cancer and died on Sunday whilst we were visiting, which we don’t get to do often as it is quite far afield. The dignity of the family struck me greatly as they grappled with this loss and remained composed and compassionate for each other.

I feel like I want to be poetic but truth is – too much to express to make it poetic.

Thing is – Tuesday evening early my daddy passed away in his pre-dinner nap.

He would have been 77 years old tomorrow.

He is dancing with my mom now – somewhere.

I like to think they are tiptoeing the stars.

I have been drawing more recently last week, and I like that. I may just continue but I felt I needed to be able to write something…anything.

Words? I did the expected Facebook post. I was hesitant at first but I just did it a bit earlier. That kinda helped to get words going again.

I wrote the following, and put the pictures you see below, as it is true:

’25 September you would have been 77 years old. Neil Terrance Eardley, passed away peacefully in your sleep three days too soon on the 22nd September. Missed and cherished memories. How we will all remember you? Just like in that joyful photo waving cheerfully to the world! Always a smile on your face, and a good joke to tell, even in the toughest of times.

Rest in Peace Daddy. We know you tried your best to live to these, your favourite words carried with you everywhere you went.(found in your briefcase today with these photos, now on your pillow)

Go! Go dance with your sweetheart again.’

I think he will approve.

It reminds me of those announcements they did in the papers in days gone by, which made it easier to do and makes this easier, without feeling false… merely – human I suppose. We want to share things with people who have become part of our lives and there are those of you here who are so much part of my life – and – well really –  been a shit ass of a week!  Lots of tears but lots of laughter and smiles too.

Above my parents bed a plaque hung and on it was written:

‘Do not walk in-front of me – I may not follow.
Do not walk behind me – I may not lead.
Just walk beside me – and be my friend.’

This is what humanity seeks.

So really – I will leave you with the words I grew up with, for mine and my families remembrance here, which hung most usually outside my parents room (which influenced me greatly to write poetry) and my favourite picture of them and one of my dad waving his cheerful and unmistakeably HIS hearty wave (another favourite).




Life has shifted, as it does.

R.I.P. Daddy – till next time.


9 Things I Learned From Not Blogging Every Day


Not much to add – Linda says it all. :)


Originally posted on Linda G. Hill:

As a blogger who has gone from posting occasionally, to every day and then back to once in a while, I’ve found there are both advantages and disadvantages to both methods. Some of the good points only apply to the blog itself, but some are important factors for general well-being. Here is my list:

For the Blog

  1. Posting every day creates a momentum. I often got almost as many views from the post of the day before as I did the current one, thus doubling the number of views. When posting only occasionally, views plummet on days I don’t post.
  2. Time of day is important! Even though I posted every day for a year on my fiction blog, the number of views went down if I published after eight at night. It was the same deal if I posted too early. Followers get used to seeing you at the same…

View original 316 more words

Taste Life


‘The World Through My Eyes’ ~ Colour Pencil On Paper. Copyright – Idiot Writer/Belinda Borradaile

Now do you see
Me lift the glass up to my lips?
Drink it in
As it begins
To pull my heart apart.

This cup
Held fast
In youths demise
Chained upon my face.
See me – see me
Please believe me

If you will be wise

Look away
Do turn your face
In sadness to your chest
Half of me is all you see
Fluidity your guess

You know me not
Though hear my heart
Silent as it calls
For you my friend
To rise again
To face
That is yours

As the sun shines
In my eyes
In lines across my face
I smile to know
I love you so
Though in another place

You can not know
All I was –
All I was to be
What will soon
Become of me
As surely as you see

The future holds
In it’s hand
My mind opened to be
In these dreams –
You hold me fast
Show me to be free

Dreams are dreams
We dare to feel
Dare to fill our souls
But dreams are filled
With waking
Into our futures hold

Time comes fast…
Too fast dear one
Into the soul and breast
The empty womb
Will be your doom

Walk on –
Taste life,

My sweet.


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